:(

Went out to celebrate jin qin's birthday... supposed to be happy event...

but...

i lost my mp3... with my expensive earphone...

sian.

no mood to elaborate any further

sighs

Judge.

Who am i to judge others... ?


The person i should judge is me myself...


Many things left to change in me

Its just me.

Its not with others.

The problems doesnt lies with others.

It lies with me.

Paranoid... paranoid and more paranoid. When did i become so... paranoid?



Hope somebody up there will give me a chance in life.

Train train train

I want to have a killer bod. Much more work to be done... argh...

That hopeless feeling

Ever felt powerless? hopeless? and answer-less?

My fate is hanging on the thread and the verdict that will affect my life is yet to come... but surely coming. Living every day feeling uncertain. That day... i dread it coming. How i wish i could just find myself awoke in a snap of a finger just to find that its just a long terrifying nightmare.

Dont wanna contact anybody... Just wanna try this method... of keeping stuff to myself, cause it doesnt matter if i shared or not... the day will still come.

Im just somebody ordinary

"we are just normal people, why must we think too much and stress yourself, make yourself feel terrible over the things that are not confirmed and things that you cant control?"

Realised i havnt been seeing myself as someone ordinary... i really should now.

Work hard kelvin...

:)

A change

There are a few things i hope to change in me....

... and some things i wanna keep in me

I must learn how to control my emotions

learn to be more open and easy on my on-goings

And learn to let go of anything if required

I just wanna be a better person, for others but most importantly... myself

School fee

Wah.. paid school fee yesterday.

bank account was like suffered a atomic bomb blast. Now left with barely anything. haha!

No worries... the rebuilding process starts now. Aiming to reach a new milestone in numbers yet again :)

Short hair!

Omg im feeling so comfortable now... short hair... cooling... easy to style... dont really need to care much...

Army days... haha! :D

A quiz that shakens me.

I done a quiz a few days ago... a quiz that spawns random love qoutes for you. And i got one which shakes me awake... really hard till today it's still repeating in my head non stop....

here is the qoute..

"Someone asked me, "Why do you keep loving someone who doesn't love you back? There are tons of fish in the water." I simply replied, "Just because it's also water, would you drink from the sea?"

Thats me.

thanks guys!

Thank you for being present to spend my bday with me.

Althou its nothing but simple outing, but its just the way i like it... simple!

There are some who had exams the following day and some having exam somewhere ard the corner... but they too made the effort to be there. Im really touched. Thanks people :)

I wont take anything for granted. You guys are great.

I might not show it, but im really touched.

Thanks for the presents too... but im sorry to say it is not the best present i received, cause the best present i received for my 21st birthday today is you people's effort to make your attendance available for me. (be it people whom have exams to people who took leave from work just for me).


:D



went to cathay to have sushi buffet with friends, the place is ok, but the food is great. better than sakae, thanks for your recommendation sue! haha. And went to PC bunk for a round of left4dead while waiting for our movie timing to come.... watched saw 6, coincidently its only in army that i watched all saw movie episodes from saw 1 all the way to saw 5. To people who had not watched, they may think its all about blood, intestines flying out, brain exploding and all the gores. But its not... theres a story behind it, and the amazingly twist and turns in the movie. Still im surprised that there were many female audiences. Saw 6 is a good movie overall, but its not as hardcore as the previous episode. As in there is lesser gore in this latest movies compared to the previous few.... But still its not for the weak heart people :D


Left to right: Zheng long, Jin long, Me, Royston, Aaron and Jin Qin

Dinner with family

For my birthday. My favourite stingray and dishes... :)


My sister and me

Edited post

After much thinking i think i should just delete my previous implusive post.

Alright. I got the right guess... saw how you and your new guy is enjoying life.

Since you believe that he will be more successful than me... so be it

But i beg to differ. I have 4 more years on my side. 4 more years down the road, at your bf's age. I will be much more well off than he is now.

And after reading your blog, i think you are more suitable to him than to me, because i deserve a better girl than you.

I can forgive you and i should as a guy. but i can never forget... some things.

But still all the best with you and your new guy. All the best

Burning fire

As each day passes i felt hotter... im on fire... motivations sets in and keeps increasing.

Felt like im going to explode. Cant wait to start my roadmap for my future.


Had been training my shoulder's muscle these few months.... hope to have better rounded and bigger shoulders haha!

Last year's birthday

I spent it with you.

This year it is gonna be very different. Instead of just you with me there will be loads of people :)

I like short hair, cause i perfer boyish looking guys. Guys should look like guys man....

But i was thinking...

Last year when i was still in army i had my hair short so i decided not to cut my hair and leave it longer... And i dont want to take pictures with the same kinda hair. This year is something new! yea.... (its not long anyway to my friends).

So yeah... cant wait... 4 more days

Last year's birthday with you, my smile ... will i smile better than this on this year birthday?

Chance

Chances come and go. Some are present cause they are created... some come out of no where just as a surprise.

I got one at work a few days on work, Am gonna do a follow up soon.

Wish me luck :)

Still hurts

Whenever i recall of my army days... you come into the picture...

whenever i don my green uniform i think of you

whenever i walk through the same way we used to take going back to camp you haunt me

You are part and parcel of my army life

Every single sweat and blood i shed in the army, i used you as my motivation

Every free time i can steal... i would call you to accompany you...

Because you complain how much you miss me and how i didnt have enough time for you when im in camp.... i tried my best to give u all the time i had.

Its been quite some time since you left me.... in a hurtful, confusing and humiliating way....

Even though you are not the prettiest gf i had

not the tallest gf i had

not the smartest gf i had

not the sweetest gf i had

not the most caring gf i had

but i still have to confess that you are the one i loved the most.... i gave you everything i had. everything you people can imagine.

because of you im broke,

because of you i had this distance with my friends.....

don't you know how upsetted i felt when i have to face my friends whom i neglected forcefully... how insecure i felt just because i wanna make you feel secured and how hard i worked for you and all the unnecessary stress i gave myself just for our future...

i guess you don't... cause less than 2 weeks after you are right there in another guy's arms.

While me... now... still alone.

Go away now will you.... stop haunting me. Im trying to exorcise you. One day i will... one day....

Blast your speaker!

Up your volume when in my blog! listen to this song!

Its like my primary 5 favourite boyband backstreet boys.

Oh my gosh... they are back with a bang. This song really makes me move my body...


Enjoy! :)

Will you fight for your country when required?

Somebody asked me this today.

I will without needing to think about it.

I may be complaining and whining about the trainings and everything but when the time comes i will not hesitate to pick up my arms and fight.

I will not hesitate to kill to protect the interest of my country. There are just so many things that i will protect for.... I love this place. And the people in it.

This is my laopo. Shes my enemy's nightmare :D

Female BFF

Is it possible for a guy and a girl to remain as really good friends... bff (best friend forever)... just that and nothing more?

This question is still on my mind. I had quite a number of female friends which most of them are nothing more than a hi-bye friend. It would be really cool and nice to have a female best friend.

thought i had one previously, but it ended up quite badly with her saying things behind my back....

Some will slowly fall for you...

And there are some really promising ones, everything was right but through time everything slowly fuzzies out and close friends turn into hi-bye friends....

Its an interesting topic to really think about.

It is not impossible, maybe its fate or just me that i have to reflect on myself on whats wrong with me. maybe the problem lies in me. Hmmm....

But i guess everybody will agree that its really hard... isnt it?

Dim sum and gang

My mom made some siew mai... those where you buy it frozen in the supermarkets. It was delicious ! Suddenly miss dim sum. lols

Oh my gosh there are just so many food im craving for...



Japan food, sushi... etc.

Thanks to a nice friend of mine who recommended me some sushi outlet im going there with my friends on my birthday. Cant wait till that day. countdown of 7 days starts long ago. :)

Yesshhh. Im crazy about food!